Brighter Than The Darkness

April 19th marks the anniversary of the last time I planned to commit suicide. It’s been ten years since then. Today I’d like to share something I’ve spoken about before with the hope that it reaches the person who needs it today…

For far too long I sought the approval of others and set my desires aside
Pleasing people became second nature
Yet as hard as I tried, I could just never fit in
Depression and insecurity overwhelmed me
Voices in my head telling me, “There’s one way to take the pain away”
Knife in my right hand and bathroom door locked
My mind was set on doing it until I heard a knock
It was my little sister
“Kim, how do you spell elephant?”
My heart sank
Tears streamed down my face
Everything that happened before that moment didn’t matter
Not the neglect
Not the molestation
Not the teasing
Not the physical bullying
Not the need to be accepted
Nothing
At that moment all I could think about was my sister finding me
It took a split second to change my life
Better said to save my life
You never know what someone has endured or is currently enduring
Don’t be the person that makes them break
Before you snap
Before you scream
Before you do anything unkind
Know that it took six words to save my life

To my friend struggling with thoughts of suicide, please know that you are brighter than the darkness that is trying to consume you on the inside. The world needs what only you can provide so take my hand dear friend, together we will survive.

4 Comments

  1. Wow thanks for sharing. This is really important to talk about and I hope your message reaches and helps people who need it! I’m glad those words saved your life!

    Like

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